Please hear the satirical tone in this writing. This might be a little offensive, but I am just trying to make a point as clearly as possible, ironically while saying it backwards. At the end of the day I think everyone benefits from travel, and if this article describes you, traveling actually might be the perfect experience to expand your world in a positive way. So if you’re not going to find this funny… go to the next post now…

If any of these apply to you, here are a few reasons among many that should cause you to reconsider before attempting to travel.

You aren’t ready to try anything new – If you like your life, like your routine, like your food, like your street, like your habits, like your people, so much so that you have no desire to experience something different for a measly week of your life, don’t go. If you want your bed, your pillow, your road, your air – stay. The number of people who want the United States style when they travel and are always complaining and always searching for something to be exactly like the States… please, stay home. We don’t want to rub shoulders with you while traveling. But let me remind you… it’s only a week of your life, and has the potential of changing you and your perspective and making you a better person. So pick your poison.

You are convinced the way you do it is the only right way to do it – You have found the corner on the market and everyone else in the world is only hoping that one day they can stumble upon your way of doing things and be finally enlightened.

You don’t think anything is beautiful – That stunning waterfall, nope. The dimensional stars in the night sky when you’re at an altitude of nearly 8,000 feet, nope. The skyline of Panama City stretched out across the ocean and speckled with palm trees, nope.

You don’t like to meet people – You can travel with a group and mainly stick with your travel buddies; you don’t have to be the world’s chattiest person. But if you have no desire to be with new people, no desire to ask a question here and there, no desire to see people who look and dress and carry themselves different than you and share a smile, stay home.

You can’t roll with the punches – Things will not go according to plan. If that’s gonna make you lose your lid, either bring some extra tape to fasten it down or reconsider clicking “buy” on that ticket.

You can’t eat rice for a week – The world loves rice, okay? And thousands of years of global history shows it’s not gonna kill ya to load up every plateful of your week (or life) with rice (barring an allergy or other health condition.) On a sincere note, it always struck a strange chord when guests visiting Quito would complain about how much rice they had to eat four days into the trip. Because the rest of us (expats and locals included) had been eating rice every day for the past few years, and we actually liked it.

If a bunch of these apply to you, stay home baby, ’cause there’s a grand world out there waiting to explode your mind and take your breath away.